SOme humour

[Donovan Rebbechi <elflord@pegasus.rutgers.edu>]

SOmeone posted this to C.O.L.Advocacy. I didn't want to deprive you guys
of the pleasure of it ... so here it is .

From: Stephen Hooper <shooper1@flash.net>
Newsgroups: comp.os.linux.advocacy
Subject: Non-technical reasons why Linux is superior
Date: Fri, 31 Jul 1998 01:24:57 -0700

I doubt that anyone with half a brain cell could fail to see the
technical superiority of Linux over any Microsoft Operating System.  It
doesn't crash, it is fast, and it is lean.  It is free.

The problem arises when you deal with people that just don't understand
the underlying beauty of Linux.  These are the people that think that it
is /*cool*/ to follow the herd, the people who think that you have to
buy an Operating System to run on workstations, servers, and firewalls.

These people may need some non technical reasons to try out Linux,  here
are some good ones.

-It sounds so much cooler when you speak Linux.

Versions:  I am running Microsoft Windows 98, vs., I am running Linux
kernel 2.0.29.

Speed: I have a 200 Mhz Pentium, vs., my Intel box is running 398.95
Bogomips.

Programs: I used 'edit' to Find and Replace all the occurrences of
foobar in the 'C' program, vs., I piped the 'C' file through 'sed' to
replace foobar.

Usage: The program I was working on locked up my system when I compiled
it and I lost all the work I had done these last X days, vs., The
program I was working on crossed the line, so I killnined it, fixed the
bug in source, and recompiled.

Other: DLL's, VXD's, copy, del, etc., vs., daemons, awk, grep, sed,
core, etc.

-Linux has much better logos, and mascots, sayings.

Who wants a Bill Gate's stuffed toy.  Tux on the other hand is kind of
cute.
The 'Window' of Windows versus the red X.
"Venimus, Vidimus, Dolavimus", vs., "Where do you want to go today?"
(or, "How do you want to crash today?")

-Linux users are much cooler to hang around with.

Speaking from experience, people locked into the myopical point of view
of Windows tend to be nerd wannabees, willing to sort-of-hack nine to
five.  Linux users, on the other hand, are super nerds, willing to hack
until they drop.

Also, would you rather drink with a bunch of guys that argue which
Access version was the best, or a bunch of guys that argue about which
is better, "vi" or "emacs".

-Linux promotes soberness.

To MS OS'es 'Del', 'del', 'DEL', 'DeL', 'deL', 'dEl', are all the same
command.  You can be sloppy drunk and still manage to get out a command.

To Linux you have to type 'rm', it won't accept 'RM', or 'rM', or 'Rm'.
Obviously this promotes soberness ;-)

-Linux is for those with an aversion to the color blue...

Linux will never give you a blue screen unless you ask it too.

In contrast, Windows pops up with a blue screen at random times, giving
you no warning that the color blue will soon appear.

-You can say the word 'Linux' with food in your mouth.

Try saying Windows with food in your mouth,  chances are that once you
get to the 'dows' part, you'll end up spraying someone.

-Linux will save your computer hardship.

I have not met a Linux user yet that wants to hit his/her box.  Windows
encourages you to hit the computer as hard as you can, at random
intervals.

In the same vein, Windows encourages people to yell profanity at the top
of their lungs, also at random intervals.  Linux does not.

-Linux is dog, spouse, kid, friendly.

People using Linux are less inclined to strike out at the nearest living
thing near them.

Windows encourages people to kick their dog, yell at their spouse,
alienate their kids.  This is usually preceded by the aforementioned
problem of the random blue screens.

-Linux prevents hair loss.

People using Linux never want to tear their hair out.

Most Windows users are bald.


PS

If you have seen, or written anything similar to these, I am sorry I
didn't know about it, (consciously at least :-).  Similarly, I take full
responsibility for these.  If they offend anyone, flame me.